On a lighter note

Seems I only blog when I'm pissed off about things. Today I'd like to share some thoughts about my Mastiff, Ben.

Ben is and English Mastiff. Now, this breed isn't like other breeds. So lets discuss that aspect first. Every breed was originally bred for a purpose. Standard poodles, although cute and extremely smart, were originally bred and used as a retriever, just like the Lab. German Shepherd Dogs were used by ancient sheep herders to do just that, herd and guard the flock. They were later used as police dogs, but their origin was a herding breed. Smaller breeds, like the Shi Tzu were bred specifically for the laps of Japanese Emperors. So it goes without saying that the Mastiff had a specific job. Guarding.

Now, they weren't bred for their loud bark. Nor for their agility. They were bred for stealth and intimidation. Used as ancient war dogs, they donned spiked collars and armor in medieval times and went to war with their masters. Later, they were used to guard the castles from intruders. So you might ask, how did they do this? A 200+ pound dog who doesn't bark? Let me explain.....

These dogs, originally (before us "modern" humans screwed them up) were independent thinkers and fiercely loyal. They would sit outside the castle watching silently. They weren't pacing the fence, or whining with excitement. The sat calmly, quietly, watching. These dogs are stealthy, silent and can squeeze and slink through seemingly impossible areas. They watched, and when an intruder would dare set foot on the property, the dog would go. Not a loud, crashing through the timber run. Not a barking, growling frenzy. No, a fast, quiet run of surprise. Leaping into the air, they would hit the intruder full force....200 pounds of mass hitting you at a dead run would knock down even the largest of men. Sporting the spiked collar, and too much skin to get a hold of, they were a force to be reckoned with. The bad guy on the ground, the dog would, by his sheer weight alone, keep him pinned until his master or guard arrived. Typically they wouldn't need to bark, as the screams of the intruder would suffice. No biting, no thrashing, just knock 'em down and hold 'em.

Ok, why, you ask, am I telling you this??? Because my boy Ben let his ancient blood show yesterday.....twice.

Ben was out on the deck, sunning himself as usual. I decided to go out the front door to get the mail. Ben heard the door, and instead of racing around the house barking and freaking out, he silently stepped off the deck, went to the side of the garage and slinked his way silently along the wall. Going between a small shed and the garage wall, he peeked around the corner, then carefully walked between the garage and the front of the truck. Never made a sound. When I noticed a movement out of the corner of my eye, I looked over and for a split second the looks on both our faces were priceless. His was in complete ancestral mode. Looking at me, actively thinking about what to do next. Me? I thought "Oh shit", LOL It didn't last longer than the blink of an eye, but it was there. Of course, he immediately knew it was me and came wagging and lumbering over to me with the "Hi mom" look on his face. But for that one moment, he was a force that, were I a burglar or other "bad guy", I would have resigned my fate to his will. I was so proud!!

The second incident happened last night. As we know, the neighbor's dogs have been coming to my yard at night. Just the other day they killed 3 of my hens. The won't come into the yard when Ben is out during the day. They know he sleeps inside at night. Last night it was well after dark when I let him out for the final time before bed. I did my usual routine of shutting down the computers, getting coffee ready for the morning, etc. I went to the back door to let him back in only to see him sitting on the top step looking west towards the neighbor's house. He wasn't tense with anticipation or excitement. He was still as a statue, ears up, and intent. He was waiting patiently. It was a beautiful site, for those of you that understand what I'm getting at. I stood at the door in awe at not only the site of him sitting there, but at his whole demeanor. I knew instantly that if one of those Labs were to even set a toe across the "line" (both parties know where the property line is) that they would be in trouble, BIG trouble. He was so calm, never wavering, and seemed to just know what to do. I think I stood there for a full 2 minutes watching him, and didn't see so much as a hair twitch. For me, it was so completely awesome, I don't even have the words.

I tell you all of this because I believe that no matter how badly we mess up a breed, that somewhere deep inside the ancient blood still flows. I see Mastiffs in the show ring....obese, and looking miserably dead in the brain. My boy comes from show lines, champion lines, in fact. But to me, seeing what the "champions" look like, I give that title no credit. For me, a champion is one that can do what he was bred to do, and be sound in body and mind while doing it. The old ways of selective breeding are gone. Ben's breeder said he was of poor quality, and should never be shown. I say he'd put all of his competitors to shame. Am I biased? Maybe. I say the next time you buy a dog, the first choice is to adopt from the shelter. If, for whatever reason you cannot do that, then find a breeder that isn't in it for the money. Doesn't have puppies living under the porch. And knows the history of his breed of choice. And you should do the same. Know what they were bred to do, not for today, but originally. Do your research and you won't be disappointed.

Well shit. That didn't go as planned. That stupid bitch calls at the last minute telling me "Well, I'm just bringing Royalty back, can you pay for the gas? I'll bring Tom back." Are you fucking kidding me??? UGH So she arrived and I was a cold hearted snob. I had Tom out and ready. She acted all happy and trying to be sweet. She got Royalty out, I took her and put her in the pasture, giving the bitch her halter back. I then got Tom, swapped halters, and handed him over. Not once did I acknowledge her. She loaded up Tom, I handed her $30 telling her she wiped out my account. She was all smiles "Oh, thats ok, I was thinking $40 but this is fine" WHATEVER you drunk bitch. She then proceeded to.....wait for it.....HUG ME!!!! Can you believe the audacity??? "Oh honey, it will be ok, I'll keep in touch." all I said was "Yep." and turned and walked away. I was in the pasture with Royalty before she even got in her truck. I didn't say anything else to her, didn't even look at her. Fuck her.

I typically don't wish ill on people. I won't use this as an exception. I WILL however leave it in the hands of Karma. She'll take care of things for me, and all I have to do is sit back and watch.

In the mean time I'm trying to sell Royalty. During that time, I'm going to try to ride her a bit more. I'll put a tight tie-down on her and hope she doesn't rear up on me. We'll see.

Things are just freakin weird around here anymore. Life is always feast or famine it seems, but what is up with people??? Why can't I just connect with NORMAL people? Instead I draw in drunks and psychos. That being said, lets get down to the facts....

The girl that swapped horses with me can't seem to make up her mind. "Oh, you keep him, I want you to be happy...." then the next day "I want him back...." and on and on. She got pissed because my FIL decided I couldn't use his truck and trailer. I have no control over my FIL, and if he chooses to change his mind (that is a whole other story) then I can't help that. So, when she first tells me "I can come get him no problem." (she wanted the horse in her son's senior pictures, wanted me to bring him to her)then gets pissed when I tell her I can't bring him and she refuses to come get him, then I get confused and frustrated. She's also pissed because I didn't crawl up her ass and hound her about the whole thing. Not my job. She's older than me but a severe alcoholic. She can't have a straight thought to save her. Anyway, I get a text message late last night saying she's sold Royalty, will bring me the money, and pick up her horse today. Um, ok, what the hell??? What brought this on? Because I wouldn't cater to your needs?? Because I can't go where you want me to at the drop of a hat??? Screw that.

The other issue is a woman I met through the attempted sale of Royalty a month or so ago. This girl is an animal control officer in Chicago, but has a farm with her boyfriend about an hour south of me. She rescues everything, and also has mules that she rides. She wanted me to come down last Sunday and ride her mules with her. Well, it came down to basically I didn't want to go, so I made some bullshit excuse and apologized for the fact that I couldn't make it. Haven't heard a word from her since. Oh well. I don't need that shit either.

On the lighter side, I met some people who have Belgian draft horses. They are really nice, and the father (an 81 year old farmer who's seen it all and done it all I do believe)really seems to like me. He had me ride one of the horses in a parade, and also had his son show me how do drive them with a plow. I had a blast!! It surely was a dream come true for me....just being around them was awesome. I was a little kid living out something I've wanted to do my whole life. The old man kept wishing out loud that I live closer. Saying if I did he'd give me a team to "play" with and learn with. I almost shed a tear! When we were leaving he hugged me, telling me to call him or come over to his farm any time I wanted. I'll see them again at the end of the month, I can't wait!

Bad Day

I would ask if this day could have gotten any worse, and I know my own answer would be YES. However, in the moment, and even the residual effects are still shitty.

I made the first mistake of telling my neighbor about wanting to fix up my FIL's old horse trailer. He in turn took it upon himself to tell my BIL who "approved" it. WHAT? Its not even HIS to approve! But I digress, that was 2 days ago. I say this though, to illustrate the fact that I'm a slow learner.

The second mistake was posting on FB that I was going to a horse auction. Why is this a mistake? Because, by opening my big mouth AGAIN, I caused today's events. See, I traded my mare for a gelding, with the agreement that I would also pay $600 on top of that. Ok, fine. I told the girl I didn't have the money, and it would be a slow pay. She said it was no problem, pay when I could, she just wanted the gelding in a good home. Ok, fine. So here we are 2 weeks later and I post about going to the auction. Suddenly she's messaging me wanting money. I didn't say I purchased anything, I just went. Anyway, since DH and I have been living on literally nothing for the last 3 weeks, I tell her that I might be able to give her some. Then I change my mind and tell her we can trade back horses. She says "Ok", and that was it. So I ask when she is coming to get him, and her reply was "I'm coming today". Now, in talking to her at a rodeo last night she said she was going riding all day today. Then I ask her "What time will you be here?" To which she responds "Well, I won't be there til tomorrow, we're going to a fair right now"....um WHAT??? First you're going on a ride, which you begged me to go on, then you say you're coming here, then, and only when I press you, you say you're going to a fair!!! What the fuck???? Can you not make up your mind? How about making up mine??? I should not have to ask for each bit of information.

So, here's the deal....

SUPPOSEDLY she is coming tomorrow to pick up the horse. Fine. BUT, supposedly, she also has a buyer for the mare. She tells me "she can pay you next week, is that ok?" I tell her thats fine, but "is she going to mail me the payment or what?" ....."Oh, ummm, I'll check and get back to you"....again, did you NOT THINK about this when you were rambling your drunk ass around the country??? Jeez, just typing about it raises my freakin blood pressure and gives me a headache!

There is other parts to this story, like how she blew me off last night yet wanted to chat this morning wondering "what was wrong?". But really, at this point, does it matter??? I have learned 2 lessons here

1) Keep your fucking mouth shut.

2) Stop being so trusting of people. Nobody is your friend, they're all out to screw you in some form or fashion. I refuse to be an option in anyone's life. I'm not a "friend of convenience" or a "last choice".