Went to my stepson's graduation yesterday. I was so relieved that he actually received his diploma! He did so poorly in school, it was a real hit and miss when it came to graduating. The really screwed up part was that his own mother didn't even bother to show up on time, ended up standing in the back, and didn't get any pictures. Pretty fucking sad. On top of all that, we get to their house for the "party" afterward, and its a damn filthy pit. trash on the floor, dog hair (chunks of it from their huskies) on every piece of furniture, every inch of floor. Supposedly, his mom had "spent all morning cooking" and it still wasn't ready. Ok, there was NOTHING that required all morning cooking. The only real cooking that was done was on the grill, burgers and hot dogs. The rest was finger food. The bad part of that was the fact that she didn't wash any of it. I had some of the veggies, and they were horrible, tasting like the chemicals it was packed in. Then, I stood in horror as I watched her smash trash down in a bag, then grab a ziploc of watermelon and with the same trashy hand get it out of the bag and put it on a tray. BLECK!!!

Now lets talk about the in-laws. Sadly we all rode together for the 3 hour drive up and back. The ride up wasn't bad, but the ride back was unbelievable. My MIL was trying to extract info about my niece and her "love life", and then she started on my dear cousin, who is gay.

"I just feel so sorry for him"......WTF??? DH asked "Why? What is there to feel sorry about?".....she sighed, contemplated her answer and then replied "Well, you know, he's just going to have a hard life."......I said "Just because he is gay, doesn't mean his life is hard. He is doing great, and is loving his life.".....FIL said "Well, he has a good enough personality I think he'll be fine.".....then, out of the blue, MIL asked "Is he permiscuous?"...EXCUSE ME???? Seriously?? First I wanted to ask why she cared, then I decided I'd just keep my mouth shut. All I said was "He is happy being single, so no, he doesn't have a boyfriend." I put a lot of emphasis on "boyfriend" and that seemed to shut everyone up. She is so narrow minded, and it drives me nuts. All she says is "I pray everyday that he gets over this phase".....PHASE?? Really? OMFG are you kidding me??? HA!! Oh, I feel sad for all the narrow minded people out there. I really do, because not only are they making themselves look completely ignorant, they are missing out on so many good people and good things. Truly sad.

I could go on and on about my stepson's horrible living conditions, and my in-law's narrowmindedness. But I'll end here.

Thank you to all the Veterans both past and present for their service. Its because of your efforts that we still enjoy our freedom today. Thank you.

Last night proved to be interesting. DH has a trucker friend who is as redneck as they come. Great guy, a little goes a long way, but all in all a cool guy. Anyway, DH had been talking to him about me and Royalty(horse)......this guy was raised around horses, broke more than I can count, and knows his shit. Anyway, the guy came out last night to look at her and talk to me. I admit, I had to put my pride on the back burner, not because I know more than he does...not by a long shot...but because some things he was talking about and 'teaching' me, I already knew. I know he wasn't doing it to insult me, on the contrary, he was trying to be thorough. So I listened and watched intently as he worked the horse, telling me what he was doing and why, as well as why her reactions were what they were.

I learned about "personal space", which is hard for me because I like my animals to be close and affectionate. But evidently you really don't want a horse to crowd you, which on the safety side I can totally understand. I also learned what I was doing wrong when getting on and off, as well as where I should be sitting vs where I had been sitting. Now, this all sounds silly, and maybe even some people might ask "Didn't you have horses as a kid? Don't you know what you're doing?" Yes and no. First, its been 20 years since I've owned or been on a horse. Second, my horses were different. They didn't have voice commands, or even leg pressure cues. I rode bareback alot, and sat up close to the withers....this is evidently not where I should be, lol.

Anyway, I was given a few things to work on with her, and he might be out this evening to watch me ride, so he can correct me again! Ah well, I want this horse to be good, so I'll take the lessons where I can get them. I'd like for my son to be able to get on/off with me, and ride with me as well, so I better get my shit together!

On another and final note....allergies are still horrible, but I've purchase several different meds so something has to give. Its like they work for about 30min-1hr, then I have problems again. I've doubled up the dosage, and that seems to make it more tolerable, but I still just can't wait for this part of the season to pass.

Where to start today's blog? Well, lets see...

My allergies are kicking my ass. The ditches around here haven't been mowed (typically the BIL's job), and that grass along with the pasture grass is going to seed, which means I have to stay inside until it dissipates. That sucks.

DH came home last night, and is still home waiting on dispatch to call and tell him where he'll be going next. That sucks, too, because sitting here doesn't make us a dime. In the meantime, he put up some more hot wire and expanded the pasture for Royalty a bit. Some of the grass adjacent to her pasture has grown up and gone to seed as well, and she needs to get in there and eat it down. So her and Bonnie the goat are working on it. He also raked up a shitload of mown grass so Royalty can have some when she gets the other eaten down. I went out and helped, but it made my allergies worse, plus walking in that tall grass for some reason got my legs to itching bad (I was wearing shorts). So, I had to come inside and wash. ugh. I feel bad sitting in here, but I can't go out. I have a big red blister on the end of my nose from blowing so much.

I've currently got a loaf of bread rising in the oven. It still has 20 minutes on this rise, I punch it down and let it rise again for another hour, then bake for 40. I could be working on the quilt, but I'm not ready yet. I'd like to stop sneezing before working around needles.

Oh, and I found out something this morning......if anyone recalls, the girl who claimed to be my best friend basically ditched me because, as she said "You don't have the same belief in God that I do, so I can't be your friend". Well, now she is telling people that I dumped HER because I didn't like the fact that she believed in God. Really? That's crazy, since I supported her beliefs, listened when she spoke about church and Sunday school, etc. I never once condemned her for it, never once told her she was stupid, crazy, or a fanatic. I never said a word. Why would I? Its not my place to tell her these things, and who am I to judge her? So, here we are, another person, claiming to be a "Christian", not only using their religion as an excuse, but hiding behind it as well. Fucking hypocrites. Just like DH's sister. Claiming to be all about "Christian" and god and whatever. The whole time judging him for something he did over 25 years ago. Holding that over him, being fake to his face, claiming one thing and doing another. Same as every other "God fearing" person. Hell, (haha) even the Bible contradicts itself. But thats another rant.

So what else? Well, we're still on the hunt for land. We'd really like to find one with some sort of building on it. Something to provide temporary shelter until we get the cob house built. We need to find it fast, as we want to be outta here by the end of July. Will it happen? No idea, but I'm hoping.

In other news, sometime around 12 June I should have kits. What are kits? Baby bunnies. Rabbits don't have litters, they "kindle" and their babies are called kits. My son will be here on 13 June, staying for 2 weeks. Maybe he'll get to see the kits.

I guess thats all for now. Time to go punch the bread......

Get a life....

Its so funny....there are some people who have chosen to detach themselves from me simply because I don't hold the same belief system they do. This particular person has stated in their own blog that I was corrupting them, even though religion was never discussed. I was making them question their relationship with god even though I never said a word about it, and actually applauded them, supported them and their kids, with any church function they participated in. I respected their beliefs, and let them live their life how it was suited to them.

This person decided that I was too high maintenance, or too emotional, or whatever to be my friend. Despite the constant battles with depression this person supposedly has, they accused ME of being a problem. This person constantly ignored me, blew me off, and some days would flat out not speak to me. There was always an excuse "headache, kids, housework, etc" Whatever.

Anyway, we have mutual friends on FB. No biggie. But lately I have noticed that this person seems to be "following" me. By this I mean, I'll comment on a friend's post, and within 24 hours this person is commenting. I wouldn't care, but this person has RARELY, if at all, posted on these friends' posts in the past. Suddenly, in the past 2 weeks, they are posting everywhere I post, and throwing in snide, hidden comments such as "Oh, we'll have to hook up for a girls' weekend"......ok, YOU'VE NEVER CARED BEFORE ABOUT THIS PERSON!! YOU NEVER POSTED BEFORE, NEVER WANTED TO CONTACT THEM FOR A GIRLS' WEEKEND....NEVER. ugh this is the most childish fucking thing ever. I swear, I feel like I'm being stalked. Never before was this person on FB so much as they are now. WTF??

Anyway, I don't know if they read this or not, but just in case they do here is my message:

GET A FUCKING LIFE. STOP POSTING WHERE EVER I POST. STOP WITH THE BULLSHIT OF RUBBING THINGS IN MY FACE. STOP BEING A PSYCHO BITCH AND GET A FUCKING LIFE!!! LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!!

Making progress

Today was another good riding day. I've been working with her to make her stand still while I get on. Its getting better every day. Today was a shorter ride than yesterday, but I don't want to do too much since she hasn't been ridden much in the past. I also want to get front shoes on her before we get too crazy.

In other news, I got the old chicken coop cleaned out, and some sewing done. Bad news is for some reason my sewing machine decided to go stupid on me and not only continuously break my thread, but also break 3 needles. I don't know what the hell was going on, but it was pissing me off. I only have a small amount left to do on a handbag, so to see it sitting there unfinished is torking me off.

Despite the sewing machine, we all had a nice day outside. The weather was perfect, and Bonnie spent all day with Ben outside. She even helped me in the old coop. I wish I would have had a camera rolling when she decided to try to jump THROUGH the chicken wire wall. I almost peed my pants laughing. Too funny!!

Anyway, that about covers it. Nothing terribly exciting. Supposed to get more rain tonight, which sucks because we really don't need it. However by Saturday it should be in the 80's which will be great for my tomatoes! So, until I have more exciting news......

Good ride

After the spaztick episode day before yesterday with Royalty, I didn't ride yesterday. Today was too beautiful to pass up, so I got her out. Talk about a completely different horse! She stood still while I brushed her down, fell asleep while I was saddling her, and was so complacent with the bit I had to wake her up to get it in her mouth! Getting on wasn't NEAR the rodeo it usually is, and she went right to the road and did great. I was going to just take her for a 1 mile round trip. But she was doing so well I decided to take her "around the block", which is about 4 miles. She did great!! Very relaxed, going along with no problems. We were having a great time! Until.....

....until we got to the neighbor's house, where her stud "boyfriend" lives. OMG she freaked out. She wanted to go up the driveway so bad, and got pissed when I wouldn't let her. So, in retaliation, she reared up on me. Not once, not twice, but THREE times!! The 3rd time she came up so high I thought we were both going over backwards. So I just got off of her before we both got hurt and walked her home. She did fine, but its a lesson.....don't go that way!! LOL

I think the problems I had the other day had to do with the weather. It wasn't just Royalty freaking out, but the neighbor's horses, and even an experienced rider nearby got thrown. He is in the hospital with a broken pelvis and punctured kidney...peeing blood. I say weather because that evening a super-cell storm moved in, and it was major lightning, and about 2 inches of rain. I think the barometric pressure was affecting the animals. She was a completely mellowed out animal today.

Today was a good ride.

Ok, so here I am again. Things here on the farm seem to be on hold, with all the freakin rain. The garden is flooded, and I'm sure I'll have to re-plant many seeds. My poor goat and chickens seem to be wading up to their "parts" just to get around, Ben can't go out and come back in without looking like he just swam the Nile, and my horse is up to her ankles. I'm just glad she can get in the barn (the stall is higher) where there is dry straw for her to stand on. It at least gives her feet a break.

In other news I'm working on making purses/bags out of my old jeans. They don't take long to make, and although I've seen similar types sell for $20, I'm selling mine for $5. I've got a couple orders already, so I'm happy.

As for the family issues, its become obvious that since things were said, nothing will be the same. I went to a graduation party last night and you'd have thought I had the plague. I made everyone uncomfortable, and when the initial offending group walked in, I promptly walked out. I have no use for bratty 36 year old men who think that they can control my life. I could go on and on about my feelings with this person and the whole situation, but I won't. My happiness is when I go out each day to the spot of pasture where MY horse is. I smile, knowing that my facts and the truth won out. He should know by now not to play games with me....I will win.

Life is unbelievable

So much is happening right now, and the problem is I can't really talk about it. I can, but sure as shit it will come back on me. I'll just say that my in-laws are unbelievable. What posseses people to side with one sibling, or go against one child, with the entire family ganging up on that person, is beyond me. And how that one child, a grown man, can actually contact an entire town to get them to turn is even crazier. I refuse to be a part of this, and so does the DH. He's fed up, and is seeing the true colors of his family. He is seeing how they are all hypocrits. They claim to be God fearing Christians, but they have so far lived up to my opinion of all "Christians". Forgive and Forget is nowhere in their vocabulary, they hold grudges against each other from events that occured over 20 years ago, when there were outside influences, and for the last 20+ years they've been a hive of liars. The parents can't agree as to what is right, and everything for the last 35 years has been geared toward the youngest of the 4 getting everything in the estate. All land, buildings, farm equipment, etc. Its a fucking nightmare. So, until the dust settles, I'll have to just keep my mouth shut.

In other news, I'm not getting Emmett. The idiot that had the litter never let them around the mom except to nurse twice a day. He then weaned them at 4 weeks, and keeps mom away. They've got more worms than they should, and I refuse to support such a person.

I also got a horse. Her name is Royalty, and she is a 14 year old black/white paint. She is very spirited, and we both have learning to do about each other.

Anyway, for the moment, thats all I've got. So maybe at the end of the week I can discuss the bullshit going on here.

He's back!

Benjamin is back! After roaming the yard, checking out Bonnie the goat, and the chickens, and the shed, and the fence, and the mailbox, and the burn pile, and the flowers, and the water hydrant.......he's now happily sleeping on the couch! Just like old times.....love you Snugga-Bear!!!

A horrible week....

....and its only Wednesday!! This week started out with DH getting screwed on a load issue, so his miles will be low. Then I noticed my 5 week old buckling goat was bloated, and had to wait all day for the vet to show up. That night he was doing better, but the next day he wasn't up to his normal self. Tuesday night he didn't want to eat, and this morning I found he had died in the night. *sigh* I know its part of owning animals, and especially young livestock, but I have to say I cried. I buried him near where I had the Schnauzers buried, by the garden. The messed up part is that Clyde was such a sweetie. He loved to lay in my lap and sleep, or just stand by me and hang out. He loved to snuggle, and would put his nose in my neck and relax.

I hope to find another buckling this weekend, one that is already weaned. Bonnie, the doeling is almost weaned herself, so it would be a good match.

In other news, a bright note......a friend of mine whom I gave my mastiff Ben to 2 years ago has offered him back to me. I'd love to have my snugga-bear back!! I'm excited!! I've missed him soooo much!

Beyond that, I'm working on the quilt...still. Its all laid out on the living room floor, which I admit is not a good place for it, but I need to have the pieces laid out so I can see what I'm doing. I figure I'll need a dozen or so more strips to get it done. Its been slow going as most days I just look at it and say "um, no, not today". Today however, I NEED to be motivated to work on it. The garden is doing its thing, the animals are taken care of, and I've got nothing else going on at the moment. I'm sure I could find a thousand things to do besides the quilt, but I need to make some progress on it. If nothing else I need to get the pieces ironed out. ugh. I think my problem is that the sun is shinning and I'd love to be outside. Usually I save the 'inside chores' for rainy days, but then when those arrive, I just want to be lazy on the couch! So, I have to get my ass in gear and get to working on it. When its done, it will be 120" x 120"......possibly an inch or 3 bigger all around, once the edging is done. Big enough to cover a king bed with no problems!

And finally, another rant about the 'goings on' around the world. Lets see, we've got volcanoes in Iceland, rain in the Arctic, glaciers breaking up, oil in the Gulf, flooding in the southeast, and earthquakes daily that nobody seems to feel the need to report. On top of that, there is a rogue satallite in space threatening to take out 5 communication sattelites ....these cover the airlines. Go figure. I'm telling you, something is going down.....just look around and actually READ the news, all of it.....